So, you’ve decided to elope—amazing! I am SO excited for you! Elopements are all about intentionality, freedom, and crafting a day that truly reflects you. But now you’re wondering: Should we invite family, or keep it just the two of us? This is one of the most personal decisions you’ll make in the elopement process, and there’s no one-size-fits-all answer. Let’s dive into the pros, cons, and key considerations to help you make the best choice for your day.
💞 Option 1: Eloping Just the Two of You
Why Couples Love It:
- Ultimate Intimacy: You get to fully focus on each other, without distractions, expectations or drama.
- No Pressure: No guest list, no timeline constraints, no need to please anyone but yourselves.
- Adventure-Ready: It’s easier to hike, travel, or say your vows somewhere remote and wild when it’s just the two of you.
- Fewer Restrictions: Many National Parks or National Forests have restrictions on guest counts above a certain size.
- Flexibility: If we need to adjust timelines or locations at the last minute, it is so easy when it is just us 3.
Things to Consider:
- You may need to have a conversation with close family or friends who might feel left out.
- Consider ways to include loved ones from afar (Zoom, handwritten letters, videos, or a post-elopement celebration).
Best For You If:
- You want a completely private and quiet experience.
- You love the idea of doing something spontaneous or adventurous.
- You feel overwhelmed by the thought of including others.
👨👩👧 Option 2: Eloping with Family and Friends
Why Couples Love It:
- Shared Joy: You get to celebrate with those who’ve supported you and your relationship.
- Less Formal than a Traditional Wedding: It can still feel relaxed and intentional—just with a small audience.
- Emotional Support: Having your people there can add comfort, love, and laughter to your day.
Things to Consider:
- Some locations may be harder to access with a group—especially older guests or kids.
- More people = more logistics (accommodations, meals, transportation, etc.).
- Think about your boundaries. If you are a people pleaser and easily bow down from your boundaries, maybe it would be best to not have other people around to please.
- Make sure you’re inviting them because you want them with you on your amazing day and not because you feel obligated.
Best For You If:
- You’re close with family and want them to witness your vows.
- You love the idea of a small celebration without the big wedding stress.
- You want a balance between intimacy and community.
✨ A Third Option: The Hybrid Approach
Good news—you don’t have to choose one or the other! Many couples opt for a hybrid elopement:
- Say your vows privately, then meet up with family for a dinner or celebration later that day or the next day.
- Bring just one or two guests—a sibling, best friend, or parent—who you can’t imagine the day without.
- Eloping now, party later: Plan a larger celebration or reception post-elopement so everyone feels included.
💡 How to Decide What’s Right for You
Ask yourselves:
- Who do we really want there when we say our vows?
- Will having others present add to or take away from the experience?
- Are we including people because we want to, or because we feel like we have to?
Your answers will reveal a lot.
❤️ Final Thoughts
Your elopement is about your love story. Whether it’s just the two of you on a mountain peak or surrounded by a handful of your favorite humans, make the choice that feels most true to who you are as a couple.
There’s no wrong way to elope—just your way.
Need help figuring out the logistics for your dream elopement (with or without guests)? I’ve got tips, timelines, and vendor recs ready for you—just ask!
